


Santa's favourite Ho

by BrainEmpty_onlySakusaPecs



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Author Is Sleep Deprived, How Do I Tag, M/M, Miya Atsumu is a Little Shit, Miya Atsumu is a Stripper, Porn, Sakusa is a little OOC, Smut, Top Sakusa Kiyoomi, no beta we die like daichi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-16
Updated: 2020-12-17
Packaged: 2021-03-10 19:49:32
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,408
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28112679
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BrainEmpty_onlySakusaPecs/pseuds/BrainEmpty_onlySakusaPecs
Summary: In a world where Kiyoomi thought hell week and antiseptic spray finally burned him, a sexy stupid blonde sets him on fire.
Relationships: Miya Atsumu/Sakusa Kiyoomi
Comments: 1
Kudos: 47





	1. A holiday filled with ho-s

**Author's Note:**

> Hiiii so this is my first fix EVER and I'm so happy that it's sakuatsu. They literally own me, if the creators decide to sell me on black markets, I'd willing offer my whole being. N E WAAAYS, I hope you enjoy!!!
> 
> I'm not done yet, pls be patient with me heh, this chapter ain't done yet, we'll meet the stupid blonde later

Nuzzling deeper in his oversized black and gold hoodie, Sakusa Kiyoomi, Literature student at MSBY University, treats himself with the biggest tub of mint chocolate chip ice-cream from the convenience store a few blocks down, a small plastic bag filled with umeboshi onigiri and a marathon of buzz feed unsolved on the 45 inch screen at the centre of the cramped living room of his shared boarding house.

Surely, after a shitass week of deadlines and exams while running on 5 cups of coffee and red bull just to survive, not to mention running out of cleaning wipes in the middle of the week, the literature student deserves a break. 

Kiyoomi folds his legs up to his chest and props his head on his knees as he scoops another spoonful of the sugary treat. The TV emitting the only light throughout the house. He wraps his arms around his knees even tighter as eerie music plays in the background, the screen turns black and the front door swings open. 

Kiyoomi has never screamed louder in his life. 

The tub of ice-cream flying through the air, as he tumbled backwards (more like he fell off) at the back of the couch

Apparently he wasn't the only one who was startled, by the way the unknown man by the door had one hand on his chest like a old victorian lady while looking like a deer in headlights. "What the fuck Kiyo?! You almost gave me a heart attack" 

Hearing the familiar voice, Sakusa peeked from behind the dark brown leathered couch and accusingly points at the figure "Me? You," he pressed, "barged in! Knocking won't kill you, Motoya but I WILL." turning the lights in the living room on, shooting daggers at his cousin who just puffed his cheeks and stuck his tongue out. 

"But Kiyoooo" the adorable man baby whines. "You said we'd go out today! You dragged me to that convention for geeks last month so I get to drag you out of this," he gestures wildly at Sakusa's general direction. "This episode of you! I already told you last week, and yesterday and earlier at the coffee shop, after lunch and I even sent you chats!"

Kiyoomi only blinks at his cousin, _oh. OH._ He huffs, standing up, defeated. Komori takes this as a win and helps Kiyoomi clean up the ice-cream off the floor and couch before they leap into the youth of the night.

***

"Motoya." the ravenette spits out through gritted teeth, mask in place. "What the fuck is this place?"

The two college students stand at the entrance of an establishment painted with dark grey walls, looking almost black. Red flashing lights dance around the whole place, the smell of beer and smoke in air. Kiyoomi scrunched his face at the crowd in front of him, body to body, dancing (and more on touching) to the beat of music blasting through the speakers.

"Don't worry, this isn't our stop." his cousin looks extremely cheerful from 2 minutes before his murder.

They pass through what seems to be a cramped staircase that goes below the mess of a club they witnessed. The reds and blacks continue as they move towards whatever was on the end of the path.

"Komo-chan!" Sakusa gapes while a brown haired man tackles his cousin. "I knew you'd make it!" he continues to stare at the person who were in fact wearing an extremely short Seafoam green shorts covered with rhinestones and a spaghetti strap crop top with the letters H and O. He noticeably had silk gloves of the same color as his shorts and top, his shoes on the other hand, seems out of place but it actually goes well with the overall attire. Hmm, sparkly red high heeled boots.

"Tooru, this is my cousin" Komori gestures to him.

"Sakusa Kiyoomi" he does a little bow.

"Oikawa Tooru. First time here Saku-chan?" the brunette coos at the nickname, in return Sakusa grimaces. He nods. 

For the first time, he looked around the place. A fancy glass chandelier dangles at the centre of the space, black walls with silver and gold accents through and through and what it seems like booths from his left and right with huge doors facing each other. But the most noticeable part of the place was a stage at the from, it was made of glass or was it some clear plastic material? What it was, Kiyoomi doesn't know. And are those? What are those? Metal cylinder stands at the dead center of the stage. Funny, the establishment looks stable, what was it for? 

"Oikawa-san, we're about to go on" he snaps from his thoughts and looks at the man who has a similar attire to Oikawa but in greys and instead of a spaghetti strap, he seems to be wearing a butterfly top with each bead embedded along the lines and gold heels instead. His dark emerald eyes glimmering under the red lights, emphasized with a smoky black eyeshadow and a deadly wing liner. This man is stunning.

"Aka-chan! We don't go on for about 5 minutes more!" huffing and he crosses his arms. "Also, we have a new one tonight" he wiggles his eyebrows at Kiyoomi.

"Ah, yes I suppose. Akaashi Keiji" he extends his hand to the ravenette. Sakusa just stares at the outstretched hand and back to the eyes of the person in front of him and back to the hand. 

"Oh, he doesn't really like physical contact." Motoya interrupts. Kiyoomi let's out a sigh of relief from having to explain what that was.

"Then why bring him here?" he jumps when a small blonde with shoulder length hair dressed in a red long sleeved cropped sweater emerged from behind him. Equally short shorts with fluffy material hug his thighs with red fishnets and red latex shiny ankle high heeled boots. And are those reindeer ears on his head? And a leather material with a bell wrapped around his neck. The bell looks as bright as those cat like golden eyes outlined with gold highlights.

"That cute little reindeer is Ken-chan," Oikawa tilts his head to the side causing the cone shaped hat to sway and the little bell jingling as it goes, eyeing the blonde then he looks back at Sakusa.

"And you're supposed to be one of Santa's elves," coming off more like a question than a statement, he eyes the two earlier. 

"No, I'm optimus prime and he's megatron." rolling his eyes, oikawa places a hand on his hip. 

"Don't fight with the fan favourites, Kiyo." huffing at his cousin. "I'm leaving him at booth 7 tonight." he says to the three confidently, crossing his arms across his chest and flashing pearly whites. 

"Fan favourites?" loud enough for his cousin to hear him. "What do you mean fan favorites?" He only gets a knowing look from the smaller. 

"Atsu-chan is getting ready! He's just finishing up in the shower, " the blue elf winks at him. "Let's grab a drink!"

They head to the bar near the stage, different bottles shine under the faint lighting in the room. A man in a black button down with hair that looks like a mix of Akaashi and Kenma's smiles at their group. "Who do you have with you Komori?" eyeing Sakusa head down.

"That's Sakusa, his cousin. He'll be staying at booth 7 tonight." the man at the counter has an amused look on his face, Kiyoomi did not like that look. Not one bit.

"Samu! Come here! Someone's about to book number 7," he calls from what seems to be the back door.

An ash haired man emerges not a minute later with two shots in his hands. He sets them down, swatting Oikawa's hand away as he tried to get one. The brunette yelps and mumbles something like "Mean! Tsumu-chan is my favourite now. "

"Who's the unfertunate soul?" the group looks at Kiyoomi who's visibly shrinks inside his hoodie. "Ah, Rin get the whiskey." the said Rin gives him the bottle and he pours some of the liquid in the glass. "Drink up, you'll be needing these for tonight."

The ravenette down the two drinks while the group cheers for him (Akaashi and Kenma just shakes their head at the display). He feels the hot liquid go down his throat and into his lungs. The rest downs their own orders and the three bizarrely dressed stands up from their seats. "It's almost time." Akaashi reminds.

"Where are we going and what is this place?" he tugs his cousin's sleeve looking around frantically.

"Relax Kiyo, the fun's about to start" wiggling his oddly shaped brows at the taller. "We're even here already, just enjoy it. Today's their Christmas special. You gotta sit back and enjoy the show."

"How did we even get inside this place?!" he whisper shouts. "The bouncers outside and the fancy chandeliers! How?!"

"One can enter this club through either money or connections" a smug look on Komori's face, "I got connections." he finishes with a thumbs up.

Sakusa groans into his hands and furiously runs his hands through his curly ink hair. 

"Look we're here." They stop in front of one of the doors with a seven in bold silver letters. "Have fun! And no touching!" with that he pushes Kiyoomi into the room and slams the door on his face.

He's about to slam his fists on the door and put his cousin in the next episode of buzz feed unsolved when he hears clicking on the floor. He turns around to see the man at the bar but with blonde hair in the same shorts as the three he saw earlier. Instead of a crop top, he was wearing a burgundy Button down that hugs his arms and torso perfectly. Wait, is that mesh? Holy shit, it's fucking mesh. Then, he sees sparkly red thigh high boots. His eyes fall back on the man's shorts, a good amount of skin peeks from between the shorts that look a little too tight around them and the top of his boots. Are those even real?!

"Whatta we have here?" a sly smile on the blonde's face. He's standing on a small stage in the room. The only things there was a black leather couch, a small table and a pole in the middle of the stage. _Oh. So that's what this is._ A light bulb seems to go off inside Kiyoomi's head as he glares at the man at the other side of room. "Hello? Earth to Moles-kun?"

Moles-kun grimaces at the nickname. _Is everyone here giving out stupid nicknames? I would've been at my fourth episode by now. I could still go home right?_

"Yer not goin 'nwhere Moles-kun, Komo-kun said to give ya a show that'll change yer life. Not like any of my shows aren't life changin" he strides down the stage to where Kiyoomi's feet were planted. He places his hands at the side of Kiyoomi's head, pinning him to the door. Golden honey orbs swirl Kiyoomi to the dark abyss of this beautiful stranger's soul. "Ya need to sit down. Show's boutta start" he winks and he slides his hand down to the ravenette's arm. He pulls him towards the couch and playfully pushes him down. His locks sway as he leans down to where the taller is, inching closer, placing his hand on Kiyoomi's turso. He flinches slightly at the touch but relaxes. Maybe it's because of the shots he took before entering this room or maybe its how the muscles of the man in front of him, tenses then relaxes at every move, he lets the christmas elf touch him. He wants to believe it's the former.


	2. Santa's Lap

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The yummy Christmas treat

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Siel here! Haha so this is my first attempt at writing smut? hoe dear  
> What am I even supposed to write?

Kiyoomi looks into hooded eyes, filled with mischief, glinting under the red club lights. The honey orbs trail down from Kiyoomi's moles to his eyes, then to his lips and back up to his eyes. He visibly swallows as the man presses himself closer, spreading the taller's legs and settling between them, hooking one of his legs on the other's thigh, straddling him. The blonde slowly moves his hand from Kiyoomi's torso, up to his biceps, feeling every valley and muscle. He cups his face, forcing him to look directly into his eyes. Wetting his lips as he looks down on Kiyoomi's inner thigh, he caresses his way down, gliding over his client's jeans, drawing circles with his fingers at a dangerous area. And _oh god, he touched me._

Sakusa's breath hitches and he tries to pry the performer's hands away, only to be flicked away. " **No. _Touchin."_** he stands up from the other's lap and makes his way to the mini stage. A beat starts to play. _Unfair. Unfair. Unfair._

 _what the fuck?!_ Okay so, everyone knows Sakusa 'Get the Fuck-away-from-me' Kiyoomi hates physical contact, though contrast to popular belief, he has gotten laid. He actually likes the sensation and tingling from having a heated body up against his, moving and clashing of skin. He'll scrub his skin raw after, of course. But sex? Definitely not an unwated form of interaction for him. _I want him to touch me again._ Even if he didn't really touch him, he could feel himself boiling, shaking even if it's through the fabric of his hoodie and jeans. It didn't matter, he wanted to feel that again.

The lights shift from one side of the stage to the other, here he is, at some sort of bar, and took some sort of drink, sort of wanting to forever banish Motoya from dragging him out on the one day he gets to rest, sort of feeling dizzy and warm. He snaps back from his thoughts as he realizes the blonde reached the stage and from there, the performer smirks at him.

The elf has one hand on the pole, taking his time circling around it, not taking his eyes off his only audience. 

_I don't want a friend_

He stops in front of the pole. One hand holding it above his head, letting his back slide down the steel cylinder. Oh, this song.

_I want my life in two_

Spreading his legs as he kneels down, licking his lips, never breaking eye contact from Kiyoomi.

_Please one more night_

The blonde gets up, slowly, his free hand sliding up his knee to his thigh, pale against the strong color of his boots.

_Waiting to get there_

His hand skid up the fabric of his top, carefully tracing the lines of his torso up to his neck, desire and want in his eyes. Kiyoomi may or may not have felt his stomach flip. He swallows a lump in his throat together with incomprehensible thoughts of wanting to touch the man in front of him. Because, Kiyoomi wants nothing more than to get the fuck out of there.

_Waiting for you_

Swinging his head to the side, turning his back to the ravenette. Both hands on the pole now. _Fuck._ That shouldn't be that smooth. Kiyoomi clenches his fist on his lap. He can't look away. The man in front of him looks like he descended from the heavenly bodies above, radiating like the sun itself. The sun itself had nothing compared to how ablaze the dancer looked. 

_I'm done fighting all night_

The dancer rolls his body in one fluid move. Kiyoomi feels his heart is on his shirt. He feels fire on his veins, on his toes, his palms up to his fingertips. Long porcelain fingers twitch at the thought of holding the waist of the blonde, with how his hips sway from side to side to the flow of the music.

_Don't follow me, you'll end up in my arms_

Atsumu hoists himself up the pole, using one leg to support his weight as he spins around, delicately wrapping his arms around himself. His whole outfit glimmers under the lights, every inch dazzling and captivating the man watching him.

_You done made up your mind_

He goes higher on the pole, almost reaching the top, he looks from under his lashes, at the black leathered couch where his client was seated. A fox like grin spreads on his face.

_I don't need no more signs_

He lets himself slip down in one quick swift move of a split, his audience stands up, eyes wide as saucers.

All the air escapes Kiyoomi's lungs as he watches the entertainer speed down the pole. It happened so fast yet it seemed to play on slowmo for him, he could see more of the pale skin from under those shorts as they ride further up from the impressive stretch of the blonde's legs. Kiyoomi finds himself on his feet, gaping at the stage.

_Can you?_

Standing up from his position, Atsumu decides to tease Kiyoomi more so he stands up in a slowed pace, tracing his hands on his thighs up, stopping at his chest. He makes his way to Kiyoomi who, in return starts moving to his direction. Atsumu echoes " _Can you?"_

Sakusa doesn't know why but he takes a few steps towards Atsumu. The dancer has pulled Kiyoomi in his orbit, drawing him closer until they almost collide. Only a few inches away from each other, the blonde sings along " _Give me reasons we should be complete"_ then turns his back on the taller, pressing himself against him.

_You should be with him, I can't compete_

Atsumu leans his hips on Kiyoomi's, swaying them slowy, pressing them deeper.

Fog takes over Kiyoomi's head, all he could think of is how good the faux blonde felt grinding on him. He growls at the shorter which gets him a soft chuckle and a harder press of movement on him.

_You looked at me like I was someone else, oh well_

Kiyoomi huffs amusingly at the action of the blonde. "Ya like me that much Moles-kun?" Atsumu turns to face the taller.

_Can't you see?_

"No." he deadpans. "And stop calling me that."

"Are ya sure? Coz yer body says 'therwise," the dancer traces Kiyoomi's hands that were placed around his hips. 

_Can't you see?_

The ravenette stiffens, watching Atsumu draw circles on his hands. _And oh how they felt so right to be on his._ He tries to retreat to himself but the grip around him tightens. He could feel he's wanted too. He looks up and stares into bright brown orbs, set ablaze, burning him along. He steps back, only for the shorter to step forward. He takes another and so does Atsumu, not backing down, matching his movements. 

_I don't wanna slow dance_

An unreadable expression takes over Atsumu's face, then his grin returns and shoves Kiyoomi backwards. Caught off guard, Kiyoomi stumbles and lands on the couch with a thud. Not having to recover from the sudden fall, a weight is atop him. "Wear this for me, would ya? Promise s'clean." a light fabric settles on top of Sakusa's inky curls.

He blinks, "What the fuck is this?"

"Santa's hat" the ravenette scrunches his nose, making the blonde laugh. Ok so Kiyoomi's heart certainly did not flip on that. It did not. "S'for the holiday spirit, also sorta allows me ta sit on yer lap."

The said Santa scoffs, "I take that you do this to all your clients? A fan favourite, so I've heard" his lips curved at the sides. Kiyoomi doesn't even know why he asked that. Does he even want to know? Would he be disappointed if that were the case? What would he feel if it wasn't?

"Ya know pretty Moles-kun." he starts. "Yer right, m' a favourite. Who would wanna miss the chance to hafta piece of me?" he places one hand on his chest and the other one stretched out. "But yer wrong if ya think anyone out there can get this." he punctuates with a wink.

The ravenette rolls his eyes, trying to block his racing heart beat. _So, I'm the only one who got to see this and get this service?_

_"_ Gee, n'here I though ya were smart." the blonde teases which he retorts with a _shut up._ Eyes hooded with sleep and lust stare at onyx ones hungrily. "Just let me sit on Santa's lap" and the performer grinds on his erection.

Kiyoomi hisses under his breath. And repeats the movement.

"You've got nerve sitting on Santa's lap when you're on the naughty list." Kiyoomi amuses.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What's impressive is the lack of my vocabulary.  
> Enjoy the Hoelidays everyone!  
> i-I'd appreciate it if you left kudos and comments

**Author's Note:**

> What the fu was that? I honestly don't know, don't ask me or ask me idk heh
> 
> I wanna say thank you to my idiot brother neSyK for helping me with... Er.. Research for the next chapter. 
> 
> Yes, next chapter is the *sits on the table seductively* sexc- *breaks table* you know what I mean. 
> 
> Alsoooo *coughs* merry Christmas and don't forget to leave kudos and comments, any requests?


End file.
